Can You Keep Up?

Well whether you love them or you hate them. We're all keeping up with The Joneses, or rather The Kardashians...

Deny it all you want, but I am for certain keeping up with the Kardashians... well as much as you can when you sporadically watch new episodes, that air every Sunday, while I'm at work (meanwhile, they won't be airing new episodes until the spring).

Honestly give me a marathon on the weekend before the season premiere, a vintage episode where they're #relatable in their (tacky) velour working behind the checkout counter of Dash and Kylie still looked like a human being and not an alien being.

Kris Jenner's Christmas Tree

MY oh so brilliant friend has a fabulous Etsy shop, 1800PopCultureBling, please check it out!

So irregardless, I keep up- so you don't have to:

1. Where for art thou, Lord Disick? This is a plea to Ryan Seacrest and Kris Jenner (I'm sure they're avid readers), can we PUHLEASE get a spin-off? A Dr. Drew rehab special, I'm sure MTV will share.
2. Wishing this was WAY more scripted so I could write the creator, circa Shonda Rhimes, a strongly worded letter and maybe, just maybe Khloe & Lamar will stop dicking us around. Like I'm willing to write Kris & Ryan and CC Khloe & Lamar, but Khloe will for sure intercept Lamar's letter and I'm sure if I get a reply, it would be a cease and desist. Forever upset that my Big & I never got to go as Khloe & Lamar for Halloween, skull cap and Lakers jersey included, YES! Lakers jersey, holy throwback!
3. Kim K-> when oh when can we be done with Kanye?! We never even see him...
4. Kourtney-> God Bless... ditto for Mason, P (sister) & Reign
5. Kendall, YAAAAAASSSSSSSS
6. Rob-> please talk to Kris & Ryan about getting a spin-off... It could be like season four of Simple Life where Paris & Nicole were never together, that could be Rob & Scott... Just a thought! Or a spin off with Blac Chyna, maybe steal some 'Fat to Fit to Fat' glory but just do 'Fit to Fat to Fit' cause your Arthur George Socks can't possibly be making enough for you to afford that new $2M home in the family compound, excuse me I mean neighborhood.
7. Kris and Corey-> I NEED MORE. I can't figure out for the life of me how I feel about Corey... And I most definitely NEED MORE. 

Well that's it... I covered everyone. If you think I forgot Kylie and/or Cait... I didn't.

Keep Up With That,

xo,

KJB

#NeverForget

No joke-- they're a force to be reckoned with!

Room

I'm not entirely sure what that Brie Larson movie is all about... Congratulations to her on the Oscar win!

In the preview, she compares herself to Alice from Alice in Wonderland, so there's that...

Anyway, I digress--

So I'm sure we've all heard the idiom that little girls request and dream of ponies and plan their weddings...

Well I never wanted a pony- I was too big for that, and planning my wedding came much, much later... like when freshman year of college got hard...

Honestly, if you've never been tempted to marry for money or to become a stripper- did you even go to college.

What I always wanted was to have my own desk!

Growing up, I always liked being a teacher, a lawyer, a businesswoman or the President of The United States and do you know what all of those had in common... They each had a desk.

These women sat behind desks and got shit done so naturally- I wanted a desk-- really I needed a desk!

When I lived in California, I shared a room with my little sister but I dreamed about one day getting a desk.

Then mom said she had an announcement- thought it was a desk- really we were just moving to Ohio... Boy oh boy, what a disappointment!

However, mom said with the move we would have more room-- the silver lining-- I could get a desk.

Well we moved and the desk never came. Surprise, Surprise. Then we moved again, and still no desk.

Of course, I realized I didn't like not being able to swear at kids my job and the thought of willingly stepping back into a school after getting my diploma made me sick. So being a teacher was cast aside- probably too rashly- cause like summer and winter breaks, snow days, weekends, oh and yeah-- forming the young minds of society seem like decent reasons.

I'm not sure when but I stopped aspiring to be the first Black woman president... Well I won't be the first black (God Bless Barack Obama) and probs not the first woman (#ImWithHer) but I'm starting to daydream about going to law school to get get involved and to be an active participant in this society/world-- so who knows.

Businesswoman-- is essentially what I went to school for.

But the big picture remains the same-- I need my beloved and long awaited aspiration-- desk.

Well after nearly 14 years as an Ohio resident and now that I'm living at home-- I finally... GOT A DESK for Christmas!

Of course it's still in the box- needing to be assembled-- but that's neither here nor there.

So there you have it-- a long, drawn out mess... To tell you lot about my aspirations and explain my current spending on pretty and shiny things to put on my desk... and the upcoming remodel of my sister's old room into a cloffice (closet/office).

Dreams Do Come True,

xo,

KJB

Super Tuesday

I am 24 and this may be the most important and fascinating election...

I wasn't of age to vote for Obama in 2008, I did however have to write a paper on his first 100 days junior year for AP History. I'm not sure what I wrote- not because of the magical manicorn that is Barack Obama, but like- I know it was an assignment, and clearly I graduated but I don't remember anything about this paper. Anyways, I sure as shit voted in 2012. 

Are you enlisted? Signed up? registered?! You may have missed Super Tuesday, I'm not even sure what it is. But you can register and still vote come November. It's in the Constitution. It's an amendment, dammnit. It's your civic duty. 

Here's hoping we get a Hillary and Bernie ticket. I am unapologetic about that. isidewith.com  is extremely beneficial, if you don't know what's up- look into it, there's even a quiz! 

I have very firm beliefs:

1. Planned Parenthood should be funded
2. Obama should nominate the next Supreme Court Justice-> I wouldn't be mad if he nominated himself, is that a thing?
3. If you're on the No Fly List, you shouldn't be able to get a gun, guns should be regulated, harder to obtain, but most definitely legal.
4. ALL MARRIAGES SHOULD BE LEGAL
5. Political issues shouldn't be decided by religious views. -> Is separation or church and state even a thing anymore?
6. Common Core is MOST definitely lacking ALL sorts of merit!
7. Kesha having to stay with Sony sucks -> but having to stay on for SIX more albums is cruel and unusual punishment.
8. Why can corporation be bailed out-- but my stupid student loans will never be forgiven. I honestly cannot even.
9. We should have universal healthcare, cause healthcare is hella expensive! 
10. The Confederate Flag is INHERENTLY racist and anti-American SIMULTANEOUSLY. Read a gosh darn textbook! 

However, if the tide turns... I'm siding with Marco Rubio, because Donald Trump may just as well be SATAN, that comb over may just be covering up 666. Ted Cruz is a close second to being Satan himself, there's something most definitely swarmy about him! John Kasich, is not supportive of teachers and even his own business men don't like him in our lovely home state of Ohio, so in the words of Randy Jackson, I think, at least in my Big and I's favorite quote, "it's a no for me dawg." And in the infamous words of Fin Tutola, aka Ice T, "Fuck Ben Carson". Nuff said.

In conclusion, Beyoncé should just be president. 

xo,

KJB

In Beyzus We Trust

Starting Off With A Bang

Birthday Gals!!

Coffee outing with 2/21 Birthday Babe, before my trip North:

So I did a thing... I went to my happy place, Akron:

Cleveland:

We're about to drop a dope mix tape

#OOTD

Birthday present and next KJB's Book Club Must Read:

My twenty fourth year is starting off with a bang! Two weekends in a row I celebrated my birthday, with family and friends-- how fabulous! The birthday candles have officially burnt out and now I'm just 24 and ready to bestow all of my knowledge on the world. So buckle up!

xo,

KJB